Shopping for "Thank you" cards at Jewel
Andy : This is the [worst] greeting card I've ever seen in my life!
A woman next to us begins quietly laughing
Andy : Seriously, look at this card!
Me : Oh my gosh, it's like they just taped it together in the back room! Sending this to someone is like saying "Hey, I found a nickel so I bought this card for you."
Andy : "Thanks for the check."
Me : "Send more money."
Andy : OK, Kurt: find me a good thank you card.
Me : Yeah, right. The quality of greeting cards has dropped like a rock in the past few years. Check it out: Spongebob-Squarepants for college graduates. I'll treasure THAT forever. Just like my copy of "Oh the Places You'll Go". Thank goodness only one person bought me that one. Oh, look: "I wanted to send you a little green for your birthday...so I blew my nose on this card." Brilliant.
The woman stands up and walks off quietly laughing -- she's wearing an American Greetings nametag. Andy and I look at each other, die laughing, and high-five